The Sexy Zookeeper

The Sexy Zookeeper

Highest "Mating-In-Captivity" success rate amongst all the nation's zoos.

SWAT! SMACK! All that chirping and buzzing was ruining Tim's coming-of-age.

The Sexy Zookeeper held the coveted title of Current Champ from Friday, November 30, 2007 to Friday, November 30, 2007, heartily vanquishing The Birds and the Bees to earn it. Unfortunately, brutal defeat came soon after, at the merciless hands of Cassanova Cobra.

This hero's magnaminous likeness was captured at their moment of glorious triumph by Kevin .

Audience

Quotes overheard while standing in the crowd that gathered to watch the carnage…

  1. Hahaha. Good one.

    Alexander | [ a ]

  2. I can hear the Parrakeets wolf-whistling

    Sean | [ a ]

  3. The Parrakeets aren't the only ones. Hubba hubba!

    deadpool | [ a ]

  4. Her right boob is bigger than her left, mmmmm sexy!

    TheJones | [ a ]

  5. I can't believe that I am the first one to ask what the cattle prod is for.

    Jennifer | [ a ]

  6. Ooh!! Can she be beaten by the Crocodile Hunter, who woos her away from the animals with his good looks and Aussie accent? He could be beaten by a stingray... (yes, I did just go there. Probably shouldn't have. Bad taste.)

    Bryan | [ a ]

  7. Hah, good one. I like how you used my wife as your model for this beauty. I'm not blaming you... she really looks that good.

    iancorey | [ a ]

  8. TheJones - You show me a woman with equally proportioned breasts, and I'll show... show... I forget the question.

    Jennifer - Hey, it's still a zoo. You can't make out in the lion pen without some sort of protection. I mean, protection from the animals.

    bearskinrug | [ a ]

  9. the cattle prod is for giving "the shocker"

    defjingle | [ a ]

  10. RAWWRR.

    See what I did there?

    National Kato | [ a ]

  11. Making out while keeping an eye open for things that might need a tazin'; let's hope she's a good multi tasker.

    Jennifer J | [ a ]

  12. Don't taze me, bro!

    tinyninja | [ a ]

  13. You just want me to send you pictures of breasts. And who wants equal, anyway? Variety is the spice of life!
    I love the way you did the elastic parts of the sock.

    TheJones | [ a ]

  14. There were socks in that picture?

    Bryan | [ a ]

  15. of course there are silly! Two of them!

    Jennifer J | [ a ]

  16. Ok, I'll take another look and see if I can find....hmm....what was I looking for...again.... right....I'll just have to take your word for it. =)

    Bryan | [ a ]

  17. Actually... there's four socks. You want to make sure you double up your socks when you work around animals.

    bearskinrug | [ a ]

  18. @Kevin Is her high success rate cos she uses invisible semen from a test-tube? ;-)
    This just gets better and better!

    Mountain Gnome | [ a ]

  19. Oh my... my two, separate sites have come crashing together into one!

    bearskinrug | [ a ]

  20. I can see what will be the new champ... ''Old filthy zoo director'' and he will be beat by ''Big, bad, mean syndicate''

    And can't think of anything after though...

    Theplayer131 | [ a ]

  21. Is it easy to see that I'm a French speaker?????????

    I think that finally, the big bad mean syndicate could be beat by law-man, the creator of justice and destroyer of sydicates (boy, he sure is a controversial man!)

    Let's fight evil!

    Theplayer131 | [ a ]

  22. Ahha! She is beaten by... the Discovery Channel? Wow, in the words of Strong Bad, "I think my imagination's broke."

    deadpool | [ a ]

  23. I'd love to see a Eunuch-orn. Uncatchable and completely disinterested in sex

    Reechard | [ a ]

A Random Hero!

Gordian Nazi

Gordian Nazi

You can't make straight what you can't untie. Don't hate him too much. He's one of those goofy, lovable Nazis like you see on Hogan's Heroes.